As many of you know, my brother-in-law, Pat Kiger, died on February 10 from colon cancer. My brother-in-law, Jim Kiger, wrote this elegy and read it at Pat’s service. Thanks to Jim for permission to share it here. Thanks to Pat for being who you were to all of us.
An Elegy to a Loved One Gone too Soon
I walk, we walk
with a special angel
Who stands with us today
Though no longer here physically
Untethered from this insignificant rocky orb
Corporeally gone too soon
Your light too early disappearing into dark
After a long and gallant fight
Against the emperor of all maladies
That may have physically dissolved you
But never diminished you
You fought
You suffered
But always endured
With the heart of a lion
You shall never leave our side
Bound together by the Unbreakable bonds of family
Much stronger than the double helix
Or a contract scribbled by man
Above the superficial shades of melanin
A connection forged in the crucible of love
and shared experience
You stand with us today
***
We shared…
A home
A family
A history
Along this journey we experienced joys and sorrows
We laughed together
Cried together
And sometimes fought
We were
Brought together by the faith of a mother
And
The generosity of a father
Was it merely by
Random chance?
Or fate?
I think not
More like the handiwork of the unknowable
We shall never be alone
No matter where we go
Because standing beside us
Joining those who have gone before
Is a special angel
-JAK
The picture on the right is my brother-in-law, Jamie Oglesby; my husband, Wayne; his dad, Wayne; Jim and Pat. It was taken during the annual beach trip our extended family used to take, and each man is wearing a shirt representing his favorite beer. 🙂
Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many. My pronouns are she/her/hers.
I’ve watched my husband loose most of his family of 14 to cancer. Only four survived. It’s horribly painful and I’m sorry you are going through it.
I’m so sorry, Rena. We are certainly not alone in traveling this journey with a family member. Our empathy has expanded a hundred fold after this one.
I lost a friend, Sue, who was an RN, smart, funny. While she was suffering, and I mean suffering, from ovarian cancer, she was also reading The Emperor of All Maladies. Sue was beautiful and smart. Dying in pain is living grace. Pat and Sue have a heavenly reward.
They do (have that reward awaiting). I think it’s so fitting that Jim added that Emperor of all Maladies reference. It was wily and unyielding in Pat’s case. I’m sorry about your friend.
Beautiful. Thanks for sharing.
It really is. Thanks for reading/commenting.
Such a beautiful poem. Pat will always live in the hearts of his loving family. So sorry for your loss.
It really is beautiful. And he delivered it eloquently at the service, which was so challenging to do. Thanks for commenting.
This is so beautiful. So glad you shared it. And so sorry for your loss.
Thanks so much, Lauren.