None of this – absolutely none of it – needs to be announced, but I have things on my heart and this is as good a place as any to give them air.
I have been struggling this holiday season with all the things I didn’t do. I didn’t get outdoor lights up. I know this seems “small,” but outdoor lights are eminently “doable” in our new, smaller, home. It just didn’t happen. I took on some freelance obligations on top of my full-time work, and ended up backed slightly into a time management corner.
Fortunately, when we (finally) got the tree decorated tonight, I found five oversized red bows. There’s no reason I can’t put them on our front railing tomorrow. It’s not lights, but it’s more than nothing.
I’ve also been struggling (keeping it real here) with the fact that, even though I donated my size 24 jeans when we downsized, I may have to buy bigger clothes yet again. I know this isn’t necessarily a “discipline” thing, and I know I’ve been disciplined about getting back to spin class, which is helping me get back on a healthier path, but — body image issues rarely go away.
Wayne — to his credit — got us a live tree this year. We have avoided live trees ever since we’ve had cats, because they just didn’t seem compatible. Alice Cooper (RIP) loved to eat anything plant-lie. Bella loved to climb the tree. It just didn’t seem worth the hastle. Alice is gone now, and Bella is going on 10 years old. She has seemed mildly interested, but (knock on wood) the live tree is still standing.
So is our tree-topping angel, which I bought at Sears the first year we were married. She’s held together with a binder clip. She’s askew. But she’s still standing.
Maybe I should take my cue from her that no matter what tears us apart, we can still be of value.
PS: Prayers appreciated for my brother-in-law as he deals with a life-threatening illness. That’s more important than lights, clothing sizes, or leaning angels.
Welcome to this week’s Five Minute Friday. Our instructions, via coordinator Kate Motaung: “Write for five minutes on the word of the week. This is meant to be a free write, which means: no editing, no over-thinking, no worrying about perfect grammar or punctuation.” (But I can’t resist spell-checking, as you can imagine.)
Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many. My pronouns are she/her/hers.