Today’s prompt: FLY
It’s almost impossible to write today without the muted presence of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain hovering near (and in our family’s case, my brother-in-law Chuck).
Images are deceptive, especially in today’s media world.
I read Bourdain’s book, Medium Raw (it was the successor to Kitchen Confidential, which I have not read) a few months ago and loved it. I was amazed at how close he came to losing it all and how he pulled himself up through gumption and luck and serendipity.
I’ve walked into Kate Spade shops with my daughter numerous times. I could never wear much of what she made (too many shift dresses and non-curve-friendly items) nor was I up for paying those kinds of prices. Still, because my daughter loved her merchandise, I tried to open my sensibilities to it also (but not my wallet, usually).
I wonder what voices in their head needed to take flight.
If I have given anyone the idea that I am above those types of demons, let me assure you I’m not.
Even though I didn’t go into practice, the reason my undergrad is in Child Development and Family Relations and my Master’s is in Counseling has to do with wanting to undo/fix/improve issues in my family of origin.
Sample things I struggle with:
Guilt (about many things but especially the amount of debt I’ve gotten into (and remaining issues about my relationship with my mom)).
*end of five minutes*
The feeling that I am responsible for things that in some instances I had no part in.
Searing insecurity, personally and professionally.
Trying to embrace the things I am good at (writing, proofreading, editing, social media, relationships, connecting people) without getting paralyzed by the perfectionism that threatens to destroy them all.
I’ve seen so much debate on social media today about the best way to respond to friends and others who are suicidal or having mental health issues. I’ve seen people saying it’s ridiculous to tell people to reach out because they literally can’t (I get that all too well). I’ve seen people begging others to talk to them, take advantage of their ear, ask for a hug.
I don’t know the answer.
I know, speaking at least for myself, we all want desperately for our problems and issues to fly elsewhere because they are like dark clouds blocking the sun.
While they aren’t going to fly away (probably), we can surely try harder to give each other a safe place to land.
Welcome to this week’s Five Minute Friday. Our instructions, via creator Kate Motaung: “Write for five minutes on the word of the week. This is meant to be a free write, which means: no editing, no over-thinking, no worrying about perfect grammar or punctuation.” (But I can’t resist spell checking, as you can imagine.)
Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many. My pronouns are she/her/hers.