Welcome to this week’s Five Minute Friday. Our instructions, via creator Kate Motaung: “Write for five minutes on the word of the week. This is meant to be a free write, which means: no editing, no over-thinking, no worrying about perfect grammar or punctuation.” Today’s prompt: SUPPORT.
Support is sometimes (often) easier to give than it is to ask for (case in point: ME). I am reading the most interesting, compelling book right now – How to Get Run Over By A Truck.
The author describes laying there, in her hospital bed, with more broken bones and internal injuries than I can possibly describe …. when her friends are finally allowed to visit after she is moved from ICU. She says “I wanted to be the one supporting a patient, not the patient.” AMEN, sister, AMEN.
During one of my college jobs, I worked for someone I respected a great deal. I organized a retreat under her supervision, and things about the retreat didn’t go perfectly (it wasn’t all bad, but it wasn’t a home run). I remember telling her afterwards that I had felt abandoned.
AND …… why didn’t I speak up when the “abandoned” feeling started to creep in?
Some of those same types of issues have crept up lately as I have hesitated to ask “small” questions, the answers to which *may* prevent *big* issues.
I have gotten better at it, at asking the little questions, but the flip side of that is being perceived as “that person who isn’t confident in her own answers, in her ability to solve problems on her own.”
Hurricane Irma probably demonstrated why we sometimes just need to overcome our hesitance and ASK. I think it’s easier to ask when it is on behalf of someone else’s welfare than our own sometimes, but aren’t we worth answer, solutions, support ourselves?
This post is part of the weekly Five Minute Friday linkup.
Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many. My pronouns are she/her/hers.
I so agree!
I started off with the intention of writing all positives (as in “I need so much support let me try to conjure it by writing all happy stuff). The truth comes out in writing. 🙂
Great post, friend. Excited to be your neighbor at #fmf. The book you’re reading piqued my interest. What a great title. Have a blessed rest of your week. And thank you for supporting my writing and tweets. 🙂 You are appreciated.
The book is so good! I sent you the link via Twitter DM. Thank you for stopping by and for your support.
I hear you, Paula. I’d much rather be the support rather than the patient, except…it kinda goes both ways.
Compassion has to have an object, and love a focus. And I am now willing (after a LOT of kicking and screaming) to serve where I stand.
And the really odd thing is that sometimes the patient is the caregiver’s best support.
Yes – that is so true. Thank you for stopping by. You are in my prayers.
It is so hard to ask and sometimes we can’t recognize the need. (ME)
EXACTLY
I’m with you on the hating to ask thing! But when I don’t ask, I think I’m depriving someone else of being able to give…
That’s a really great angle to have.
I also find it much easier to offer help than to ask for help, but we do all need support from others at times. It’s good when we can take turns to support one another.
Yes Lesley that’s so very true.
Reading the comment “And the really odd thing is that sometimes the patient is the caregiver’s best support.” It was like someone was speaking to me, because that is exactly what happened when my best friend got cancer. Not all the time, of course. But it happened more than I would like to admit.
YES (and Andrew always makes the most astute observations…). I guess part of the point is our relationships are rarely you give 100% I give 0 or vice versa —- it’s still possible to provide support even when you are the one in the “patient” (or whatever) position. An interesting thing to think through. Thank you for stopping by.