Twenty-five years ago (8/8/92), I stood on the Brooklyn Promenade and said “I do” to Wayne.
Intrigued by the SITS Girls prompt, “If you were to describe yourself as a tree, what kind of tree would you be?,” some arborial thoughts on our 25-year old marriage.
We aren’t a “flashy” tree like the Hawaiian Rainbow Shower (Cassia) tree, known for its eye-catching blooms, its frequent changes in appearance, or its notoriety.
Source: Flickr
Instead, I like to think we have these qualities in common with other trees:
Longevity
Source: Flickr
The Great Basin Bristlecone Pines are the longest-living trees known to man. According to the National Wildlife Federation, they grow straight at low elevations, “but at high elevations, the trunks become twisted.”
Same after 25 years of marriage. Growth gets a little less straightforward as the years go by.
Faithfulness
I read that elm trees represent “dignity and faithfulness.” This elm tree in Oklahoma City, the “Survivor Tree,” survived the 1995 Oklahoma City bombing and became an important part of the memorial.
Source: Flickr
My daughter visited the Oklahoma City memorial earlier this summer and, comparing it to the 9/11 Memorial, said “it was so different in comparison, a place of looking forward.” We both place a high premium on being faithful to each other; it matters and I believe it will continue to make difference “looking forward.”.
Fruitful
Our biggest blessings are our children, Tenley and Wayne Kevin, so a tree that bears fruit is in order. And we’re Floridians, so let’s go with “orange.”
Source: Pixabay
Extending Open Arms
Even though I don’t consider us, as a couple, all that public or outgoing, we have made it a priority to deepen family ties. Ready for a tree pun? This involves, um, “branching out.” I love this beautiful live oak tree here in Tallahassee at Lichgate.
Credit: VelvetteGypsy on Pixdaus
From trying to make every get-together, and Wayne’s incredible cooking for those get-togethers, to the last three years taking care of Dad, reaching out has been an important part of our marriage.
Deep Roots
Deep roots are essential to a good marriage. I couldn’t find a great example of one type of tree that has the deepest roots in the world. Rather, I found this blog post explaining that strong root systems need water, oxygen, and space. In other words, it’s not necessarily the kind of tree you plant but how you treat it that makes a difference.
Determination also matters, as Nietzsche points out:
Nietzsche was right, as was the blogger who emphasized the fact that you have to always be vigilant to create the right conditions.
Strength
Smithsonian Magazine says this about the Baobab tree: “Its bark is fire resistant. Its fruit is edible. It scoffs at the driest droughts. It shrugs, and another decade has passed.” Sounds about right for 25 years of marriage!
Source: Pixabay
It may not be the prettiest tree on the planet but it is still there, while others have come and gone.
Twenty-Five Years Later
My favorite marriage quote came from Ann Landers:
Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses.
Now we are caught up in celebrating the new marriages of relatives who were babies (or not born yet) in August of 1992, like my niece Olivia, who will be getting married in September (this is us at a recent party for her and her fiance, John Landon).
My wish for all these new marriages is longevity, faithfulness, fruitfulness, open arms, deep roots, and strength.
And for our marriage, 25 years in, a happy anniversary to us!
Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many. My pronouns are she/her/hers.
Congratulations! May the next 25 years continue growth in love, understanding and happiness.
Thank you, Colleen.
This made me tear up. <3 <3 <3
Then my work here is done, right? (Thank you. 🙂 )
This is beautiful Paula! Congrats to you both!
Thanks!
THIS IS GORGEOUS!!! Congrats to you. XOXOXO
Thanks, Michelle.
The tree analogies are beautiful and very spot on. Happy Anniversary!
Thanks. They were lots of fun to do!
Happy anniversary! I love the tree analogy here.
Thank you, Liz! It’s one of those things that could have kept going for A. WHILE. 🙂
What a lovely post–your photos, your words and their meaning. May you have many more years.
Thank you – and I appreciate the tweet too!
Happy Anniversary! What a great analogy.
I appreciate that, Haralee!
I’m impressed by your arboreal knowledge–not to mention the lovely way you wove it into a tribute to your marriage. Congratulations on this milestone, and a beautiful post.
Thanks, Roxanne. I enjoyed poking around, learning about trees. I really want to see that beautiful Hawaiian tree now. I feel that would bring things full circle to take a Hawaiian trip to celebrate the anniversary! 🙂 🙂
I am also celebrating an anniversary on 8/8 but ours is only 22 years. All of these things you said about marriage are definitely right on! Pinning it for sure.
Aw happy anniversary to you too! 🙂
Great analogy, congratulations on 25 years! Love your pun of ‘branching out’ and how it’s an important thing in marriage that you do together.
Thanks, Elaine. Truly, the tree analogies could have been evergreen LOL.
What a great post! I praise God the He is the roots to our marriage tree. 🙂
Thanks, Jamie! Those are the best roots to have!
Well said, beautiful. We are getting married under a tree this Saturday and I want to incorporate the tree in our vows. I was looking for more inspiration for wording, thank you.
Oh love it! Very best wishes to you!
Paula, I love this! What a beautiful metaphor for a marriage, full of deep roots and yet still growing and as you say, “branching out.” Lovely.
Thanks, Laurie! Your post prompted me to revisit this one, so thank you!