About Paula Kiger

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.

FMF31 2018 Day 26: MOMENT

I am participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes 2018 (all of my submissions can be found here).

Today’s prompt is: MOMENT

Five Minute Friday

I was speaking with three people from Carrabelle (about an hour west of Tallahassee) last night at a fundraiser for the Eastpoint Beer Company. It’s a new business that had just started brewing its first batch of beer after putting heart and soul into setting up the business when…

Hurricane Michael hit.

I asked the people if they were involved with the brewery (because Eastpoint is just down the road from Carrabelle).

“If shoveling mud out of it is ‘involved,’ then yes,” said one person.

“I’ve been shoveling oyster shells out of it for days,” said another.

Maybe a hurricane’s damaging moments are technically longer than what we would consider “moments” (an intimate look between two people, the announcement that you’ve won a big award, a baby’s first cry), but still … everything changed in the time it took for the weather event to shove a storm surge ashore and barge into a small community with devastating winds.

One view of the damage. Courtesy Tallahassee Beer Society.

I am so sad for this small business (it’s why I went to the benefit). However, oddly, I would never have had the moments I had with these hard-working, funny, determined people had the tragedy not occurred.

There has been a lot of that in this region in the aftermath of Hurricane Michael.

Nature handed Florida’s panhandle moments of weather horror that changed people’s lives forever. As a result, we have had moments with each other we would not have experienced otherwise.

I read the word “momentous” is a combination of “moment” (brief) and “ous” (important).

This post-hurricane situation has created momentous relationship strength to overcome one of nature’s worst, cruelest moments.

Five Minute Friday Belong

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.

FMF31 2018 Day 25: CAPTURE

I am participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes 2018 (all of my submissions can be found here).

Today’s prompt is: CAPTURE

Picture the image of a traditional recording studio (not that I have personal experience with many of them). They are often tightly enclosed, surrounded by glass to keep the people and sound inside, coated with sound-buffering materials to prevent echo and keep the sound pristine.

Photo credit: Flickr

I am reading a book about Aretha Franklin. There’s a discussion about one of her albums, and the fact that the producer insisted the album be created at her church. The producer’s logic was that the music (I think this album was faith-centered) needed the heart that could only be captured by being in a place of meaning.

The music and its meaning needed to be captured in a place that was not sterile, a place that had memories and echoes of thousands of prayers lifted in the place of sound-regulating walls.

This has been true for me, too. A place can make a difference in how my contributions to the world turn out, and how I feel producing them.

When we put our house up for sale, I moved my laptop and the rest of my “work from home” operation to my daughter’s former bedroom. I went from the dining room table, where I had spent what felt like 13 hours a day between working and eating, to a dedicated workspace, to a desk and an environment that is more amenable to “I’m here to work” than “I’m surviving.” (And the dining room table had to happen for a period of time while my father-in-law was alive, because I needed to be in the same room as him.)

The spaces we choose for our work matter. They are a message to ourselves as well as to the world as a whole.

What do you need to change about your personal space today to capture the best essence of yourself and your work?

Five Minute Friday Comfort

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.

FMF31 2018 Day 24: BRIEF

I am participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes 2018 (all of my submissions can be found here).

Today’s prompt is: BRIEF

I had to laugh when I saw the word “brief” included as one of this year’s prompts. It’s like Kate had a crystal ball into my life! Ditto for “search” as a prompt, since my job came about partially after a year and a half as a freelance searcher (and writer).

I may say it too much, but when you’re this grateful and happy about a life development, it bears repeating. I feel so fortunate to have become a full-time editor at SmartBrief after a lengthy period as a freelancer.

I was in a conversation with a friend last night via Twitter DMs (so 2018, right?) and she asked how the new job is going. I told her how much I love it, and said something about how it can take decades to find the right fit job-wise. I went on to say, “I should have worked in something that involved my writing much sooner.”

However, there’s a reason I spent so long in child health policy. There are many reasons, including learning how to deal with multiple program partners, learning to be patient while working through the byzantine tangle of federal regulations, figuring out what type of workplace aligns best with my style.

I don’t think I’m giving away any organizational secrets to say that one of the first things I was told when I started working as a freelancer was not to veer into sending things out into the world that are “StupidLong” instead of “SmartBrief.”

Honestly, that idea transfers to life in many ways, doesn’t it? Brevity is an art form and it takes work to craft complex packages of information into concise, easy-to-digest summaries that busy, distracted people make it a habit to read.

In brief, I am fortunate to have a chance to be part of it.

Five Minute Friday Comfort

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.

FMF31 2018 Day 23: COMMON

I am participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes 2018 (all of my submissions can be found here).

Today’s prompt is: COMMON

There’s one line in Common’s The Light that makes me laugh:

You know I ain’t the type to walk around with matchin’ shirts.

But there are other passages in the song that zing with authenticity, such as:

If Heaven had a height, you would be that tall

Ghetto to coffee shop, through you I see that all

Let’s stick to understandin’ and we won’t fall

For better or worse times, I hope to me you call

So I pray every day more than anything

Friends we’ll stay as we begin to lay

This foundation for a family, love ain’t simple  

Watch for yourself here:

First of all, the “matching shirts” line just makes me laugh because that is my marriage (and my parenting, to an extent). Wayne isn’t the kind of person to be into matching ensembles (but I know he would do it if I asked). Regarding the kids, I did dress them in coordinating outfits (some) when they were little. Maybe the fact that they are boy and girl kept from from going overboard, but even if they had been the same gender, matchy-matchy probably wouldn’t have been a priority for me.

But the line “if Heaven had a height, you would be that tall” gets me in all the feels. I just love the imagery of that line. Ironically, one of the realizations I have come to over 5+ decades of life experience is that no human being ever ends up rising that high, no matter how incredible they are.

Still, it is a lovely sentiment, and worth the optimism of thinking “there’s someone out there whose stature rises that high,” whether it is as a friend, lover, coworker, leader … no matter where that person fits in a life’s constellation.

I see lots of people on social media talking about this, and people say it in person. While it may be controversial or lead people to think I’m bereft of connections, I am a little leery of the phrase “my person.” I get it, and crave having that (sometimes), but the honest truth is relationships don’t always work out that way over the long term.

It is an uncommon thing to reach the “my person” height in relationships.

Five Minute Friday Comfort

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.

FMF31 2018 DAY 22: HELP

I am participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes 2018 (all of my submissions can be found here).

Today’s prompt is: HELP

Ed. Note: I did today’s prompt by writing my thoughts by hand. I’ve typed them up below. (Full disclosure: I forgot to set my timer, so I’m not really sure if today’s contribution fit within the five-minute framework or not!)

Five Minute Friday Help

There have been countless discussions on social media (and in person) over the months following the deaths by suicide of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain regarding how people should *please* reach out for help if they are feeling desolate, desperate, down, depressed, etc.

It isn’t as easy as it sounds.

I’ve shared a bit during this challenge about the personal, internal tug-of-war that took place as I grappled with an emotionally challenging, rough issue.

The irony? I am most definitely one of those people always encouraging others to seek help.

One big takeaway from the hour I spent with a professional is that, although a big part of my approach to most things interpersonal is “it’s not about me,” when I am hurt and sad about a relationship issue that feels broken and incomplete, my deeper (deepest) inner voice chimes in. It chimes in unpleasantly and brings things way down, playing on repeat the idea that “this must be about you [and whatever is wrong with you]”

We need help sometimes to come to terms with those deep inner voices.

Otherwise, trying to quiet them through avoidance is no help at all.

Five Minute Friday Comfort

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.

FMF31 2018 Day 21: START

I am participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes 2018 (all of my submissions can be found here).

Today’s prompt is: START

My wonderful friend Sandy has been the organizer behind trips last Sunday and yesterday intended to provide volunteer assistance following Hurricane Michael.

Last week, we volunteered in Blountstown. We were tipped off to the volunteer effort by a runner friend (who is also the fire chief there). Sandy and I both have great memories of running in Blountstown, and we knew that town fell among many that were not (for whatever reason) getting as much public attention as others (despite equally catastrophic devastation).

One of the things we did when we arrived was sign in. It was a pretty informal sign-in process — just adding our handwritten names/emails to a notepad, with the organizer saying the group wanted to be sure to thank us eventually. Being a rule follower, I signed it (it doesn’t matter to me if someone sends me a thank you note later…).

Yesterday, we volunteered in Seminole County, Georgia. When we arrived, we signed in with our arrival time and completed a relatively boilerplate volunteer information sheet. Still, for a several-hour stint, it seemed like a somewhat formal arrangement.

Sandy, Me, Chika – We chose the “pet supplies” sign on purpose b/c the wellbeing of animals matters during this disaster.

As we were leaving three hours later, the coordinator asked us if we had signed out. We had almost walked right past the sheet. Why did it matter how long we were there?

It turns out that the length of time we were there does matter. The coordinator explained that every documented, qualified hour of volunteer time offsets a county liability to FEMA.

HMMMMMM – that got my mental wheels turning.

SO MANY (blurry-sorry!) DIAPERS (and a great National Guardsman)

(Note: what follows is not an official explanation, just what I have learned from digging around a bit.)

***end of five minutes***

What I gather is that volunteer hours have a role in helping the county get more money when it applies for a FEMA Public Assistance Grant. As I mentioned in yesterday’s post, the site we were at was coordinated by Adventist Disaster Response. Since this was not their first time at the disaster rodeo, I guess they know all about squeezing the most financially beneficial outcome from anything donated, whether it is time or money.

Adventist Disaster Response Team Member Helps Unload a Trailer

I honestly didn’t know local areas had fiscal obligations to FEMA after a disaster, but now that I have thought about it, the idea makes more sense.

The takeaway, however, is that we shouldn’t discount requests during this disaster period (or any disaster/volunteer opportunity) to dot the i’s and cross the t’s of the paperwork.

It may be a community’s start toward preserving funds that are already scarce.

Five Minute Friday Start

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.

FMF31 2018 Day 20: AUDIENCE

I am participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes 2018 (all of my submissions can be found here).

Today’s prompt is: AUDIENCE

Ed. Note: I did today’s prompt by sharing my thoughts for five minutes on a Facebook live, mostly unscripted. Below this embedded video is a loosely transcribed version (because I didn’t want to listen to myself a second time to dot i’s and cross t’s!).

I am at the point in the 31 Days of Five-Minute Free Writes challenge that I start thinking, “Is there some way I could do this that doesn’t involve writing?”

…which I realize is ironic, but I got there last year too, and here I am again.

Today’s prompt is “audience.” That got me thinking about three things, and we’ll see how many of those I can fit in within five minutes (I’d probably be better off staying with one.)

The first is: I love an audience. I enjoy performing, and I’ve really missed my involvement in FSU’s Film School as a background actor and volunteer. And I don’t really have the chops to do live theatre. I could get my fix that way, but it’s not really in the cards right now. I love it and hope to get back to it.

What I don’t love is an audience when I’m working. I thought about that often over the three months that my mom was in the hospital, especially the periods when she was in the ICU, because those ICU nurses do incredible things that require deep concentration while family members are asking questions and are not always in their calmest states of mind.

I would always think about how challenging that is, and that’s probably why, for a period of my life, I was in career planning, because I always wonder how people got there — got to that point in their careers. I had an assessment one time when I was at Healthy Kids that was extremely on target, and one of the findings was “you like to work alone.”

So … props to a life now where I can work alone at home, doing something I love, and get to be part of a great team but not be putting an IV in someone’s arm while five family members are asking me if I’m doing it right … and while someone’s life is on the line. That probably wouldn’t be my finest hour.

The third thing is … I just came back from volunteering at a warehouse in Donalsonville, Georgia, where they are collecting items for victims of Hurricane Michael. It’s the central warehouse, and from there the items are taken to three places: Colquitt, Bainbridge and Donalsonvile. It was staffed by Adventist Disaster Response teams from Blairsville, Georgia, and I don’t really know how ADR structures its teams.

I don’t know if the ADR teams are volunteers, if they’re compensated in some way. What I do know is they were incredible. They had quite a system set up. One guy — it was his 60th disaster being on a team. It made me think a lot about how — clearly they’re doing this out of a faith-based rationale — that it’s part of their faith to do this and to serve others, but they did not care who the audience was.

I suppose to them their audience was God; I suppose their audience had some further reward than getting past the hardships this hurricane has created. But it really struck me how they had a plan, they welcomed us in as volunteers, told us what to do, but they don’t want any personal glory for this.

They just wanted to do what was a fit for their faith and “do unto others.” It was a very thought-provoking stance that they took on how to help best. We don’t always want an audience. Sometimes we try to attract one when we really should keep quiet and mind our own business. We sometimes do things that we might be seeking some kind of notoriety for ourselves when the real reward is in doing the job quietly.

But whatever the case, I do encourage you to become aware of what your style is. For me it has a lot to do with my style and what work environment is best for me. But it is also — having been with these Adventist response people today — it’s a reminder that there’s an audience beyond us, beyond social media (and I know — I post a lot!). There’s an audience beyond the pictures we post and the sentiments we share that is watching to see if we are making choices that benefit the greater good.

My thought for the day is: think about who your audience is; work in a way that is the best fit for you and do some good in the world. There are people out there who need it.

Five Minute Friday Comfort

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.

FMF31 2018 Day 19: WHO

I am participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes 2018 (all of my submissions can be found here).

Today’s prompt is: WHO

Today’s prompt is one I am taking literally.

One interpretation of “WHO” is the acronym for the World Health Organization.

I end up writing and editing content about that “WHO” three days a week, because I edit the UN Wire SmartBrief.

The fact that I get to edit the UN Wire SmartBrief is such a serendipitous thing for me that I am still, more than a month into it, a bit incredulous at how things end up working out the way they were meant to.

I was slightly involved with this newsletter when I was a freelancer, searching for and writing some of the summaries for it, then my duties took me to other topics.

Once I began applying for full-time positions, two of the ones I applied for ended up being filled by other applicants (who are fantastic, by the way). When I applied for the position I ended up in, I wasn’t aware it involved editing UN Wire.

UN Wire is such a personally satisyfing piece of my job because I have been involved in Shot at Life, a United Nations Foundation grassroots effort related to helping children have access to immunizations, for years. Before that, I was involved in the UNHCR Blue Key project for refugees.

I am reminded each time I edit this newsletter about the enormity of the world’s problems, juxtaposed against the miraculous fact that people keep trying to resolve them.

***end of five minutes***

I’ve tried (and not entirely succeeded in the way I wanted to) to explain in writing how it is worth doing the tiny things (tweeting a legislator, calling a legislator’s office, sending a constituent email) to achieve monumental accomplishments.

For example, I was recently involved in a RESULTS effort to get the United States to send a representative to the first-ever “high level meeting” at the United Nations about tuberculosis. Set aside the fact that there shouldn’t even have been a question about our nation sending someone, the process to try to get it to happen involved lots of small efforts aimed at creating the critical mass of public input that would sway those in the position to decide. We appealed to our representatives and senators to sign a letter that encouraged the administration to send someone.

—to send someone to a meeting…

—that would ostensibly set in motion efforts around the world to detect, treat and prevent TB.

Source: WHO

It would be easy to give up on thinking that the five-minute (at the most) act of sending an email could make a difference, but it does.

The US did end up sending someone to that meeting.

Somewhere out there in the world, a simple email may make a difference to someone who needs the opportunity to live.

Photo credit: RESULTS

Five Minute Friday Comfort

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.

FMF31 2018 Day 18: SEARCH

I am participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes 2018 (all of my submissions can be found here).

Today’s prompt is: SEARCH

One of my duties as a freelancer at SmartBrief was searching for stories to be included in our newsletters. Searching was one of my favorite things to do, for a variety of reasons. For the six months or so before I transitioned to being a full-time employee, my searching duties came after a few hours of intense concentration while editing. The searching gave me a chance to switch my brain to a different mode, relax a little bit, and discover what was going on in the world.

Besides my daily searching (which had to do with legal content), I also searched every weekend for agriculture-related stories. As with any industry, I discovered what a vast array of writing exists about extremely niche things. (I also discovered lots of very good writing about these niche things (and plenty of not-so-skillful writing)).

I had a list of sites I visited routinely. One site I visited stayed on the list, not because it had anything I could use for the newsletter and its narrowly-targeted topic, but because I just liked it!

The site is The Farmer’s Daughter USA. Amanda, the author, grew up farming, has definite opinions about many things policy-related, including agriculture legislation and GMO foods. But she is also a practicing attorney and has managed something I haven’t: creating a catchy design for the blog itself! (She also has a fun Twitter stream at @farmdaughterusa.)

I don’t do the in-depth searches anymore, but I get the opportunity to support other people as they learn to do them. I hope they enjoy it as much as I did, and discover the principle that applies as much to searching for news stories as it does to life in general: take a look at the things that don’t initially seem to be a fit, because you may find something even more personally satisfying!

Five Minute Friday Comfort

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.

FMF31 2018 Day 17: PAUSE

I am participating in 31 Days of Five Minute Free Writes 2018 (all of my submissions can be found here).

Today’s prompt is: PAUSE

When I knew today’s prompt, pause, was coming up, I got it in my head that I should literally pause my life for five minutes as soon as I could once I woke up. I wasn’t sure what the end result was that I was seeking, except maybe some brilliant insight I could then write about for this five minutes.

I made my coffee (because some things really must come first!), then went on my back porch, set my phone timer for five minutes, and otherwise paused life and sat.

I watched my neighbor’s car lights as she headed for work, remembering all the years we were both headed to the same office, and thinking back on so much about that shared experience.

I watched other neighbors’ headlights as they headed off to work, and had one of the many endless moments of gratitude I’ve had for a) having a new job and b) being able to work from home. No “leaving the neighborhood” headlights for me. It’s a wonderful thing!

I heard the birds sing.

I heard the traffic go by in the distance (the interstate is close enough that when things are quiet we can hear its traffic). Maybe it was normal traffic, but in my head, at least some of them were more supplies headed to the areas hit so hard by Hurricane Michael.

I wondered where troopers sent the traffic on I-10 last week when they closed a large section due to the hurricane. Where could they divert traffic that wouldn’t put it closer to the affected area and create more problems?

This last thing is the kind of question I like to toss around in my head. The beauty of an enforced pause is giving my brain time to play in a world where I’m usually demanding it to do something more structured.

It was five minutes well spent.

Five Minute Friday Comfort

Wife of one, Mom of two, Friend of many.